Prejudices- Inherent & Acquired

“But why?” is a question I constantly seemed to ask people when I was a child. There was this Sports Shoe Shop in our neighbor hood and everybody knew the owner, he was dumb and deaf, yet he never seemed to have any problem communicating with any of us. In 1992-93 things changed. The change was apparent, some people stopped talking to this man and others maintained cordial civilities expected of them. This was a very strange experience because noticeably the neighborhood which once used to boast of being very cosmopolitan was suddenly divided. Babri Masjid was demolished on 6.12.1992 and all hell broke loose. Curfew was declared, violence continued, schools were closed, people feared venturing out of their houses. During one of these days while walking on the streets with my mother I saw that the shoe shop was not there any more, it was burnt down. Why? Because the owner was a Muslim. Who burnt it down? Hindus. But am I not a Hindu? Are Hindus bad? My parents fortunately don’t harbor communal sentiments and back then I think they tried really hard to inculcate in us the importance of knowing that people who senselessly go about disrupting peace are the enemy not someone belonging to a particular religion.

When school finally commenced the hostility continued – among students. I had 5 really close friends. We always had to hang out together and we were also very protective of each other. One of these 5 was a Muslim boy.[I was the heathen Mangalorean, the others were the Pigeon eating Assamese boy, the skinny Christian, fat boy coorgi and the bad mouth Bengali] Now my friends and I were just happy that school was open and we could all catch up on every bit of time we lost. Assuming that nothing had changed we took our places in class only to realize that this guy didn’t join us. Kids we might have been but we went up to him and started talking pretending not to have noticed that he’d ignored us. This tactic didn’t work and to make matters worse ALL 6 of us were boycotted by the remaining 29 students in the class. Ah and to make things worse the other 4 decided to cross over to the majority. I can be as stubborn as a mule and did not relent. Having my brother in the same school was a consolation; I’d tag with him following him like a little puppy everywhere. This went on till the academic year ended. During summer holidays my dad and I had been out and we ran into M.B and his father who also happened to be my father’s friend. I said hello to my friend and his dad, my dad and his dad started talking and after maybe half an hour they noticed that my friend and I weren’t talking when asked why we just shrugged our shoulders and in an instant we were back talking. [We were back to being a group again.]

This guy didn’t talk to us for 4 months because he thought we secretly hated him but pretended to like him. But when I didn’t join forces with the other classmates he wanted to come and talk but was too proud to do so and only after seeing that our parents had no problem conversing he concluded that I wasn’t pretending.

The same year I saw a girl being molested by a temple priest in a temple. Where was god then? Did god take a break? Back then I had only developed a fear for temples but soon realized that this happens everywhere –temples, churches ALL religious places for that matter. That’s when the whole vision of god crumbled. [I have nothing against people who believe in god.] But for me people weren’t the same anymore.


In 1996-97 I witnessed more violence when buses were burnt down, people fought on the streets more divisions. Why? One insane man crashed a bottle of liquor on Ambedkar’s statue. This incident didn’t even take place in Mysore but the impact of one man’s action caused so much loss to public property and cost some their lives too. At times like these being a Brahmin is not a good thing. Again in school people started pointing fingers. One girl told me that my family and I were responsible for her family’s current situation. Not being the docile easily bullied person I asked her to elaborate. Apparently the Brahmins looked down upon the shudras the lowest caste in our system and never gave them an opportunity to come up. Ok so I along with a million others descend from this branch but I cannot go back in time and remedy what people did but I have never judged a person because of their caste, family or their financial background. She also said that the atrocities against them could only be quelled if the Brahmins paid for the education for the SC/ST people that would be a fitting punishment to our caste. My retort? Your parents are financially capable of sending you and 20 more like you to school why should someone pay for you?

This classification did not matter to me till I wrote the NLSIU entrance exam. I got ranked 186 amongst thousands of students but only the top 100 make it out of which only 50% seats are for general merit, 33% for SC/ST. My rank was good but when I scrolled down the list to see the seats given out in reservation and the corresponding score of the candidates—there were students who made it to the college because their score was a 42 as opposed to my 126. Why? They were SC/ST and I wasn’t. I cannot express my feelings it was less anger, lots of disappointment and a lot of weeping. I HATE reservation. Why don’t people recognize merit? Why bring caste in it?

2006- The reservation was supposed to be 50%. Honestly how much more easy do you want life to be? These people not only make it the best colleges, but also get the best government jobs. I have nothing against a deserving candidate getting the job but when it is based on criteria such as caste nah… no way. I work hard, slog get a good percentage a good score in the entrance but who wins? A person who doesn’t have a good percentage, a paltry score but belongs to a backward class so serve them the seat on a silver platter. What am I supposed to feel? Say ok and accept the second best and move on? [ Any body who says that people belonging to backward classes work hard but, don’t have as much exposure as the rest of us do, or people saying that I have had things easy all my life but these kids haven’t – Darlings the answer is in your own argument. Government should concentrate on education at grass root levels not at secondary or college level. Because then we’ll have built a common platform for all. But why would anybody change that? It’s these students who get seats so easily that finally vote for the government that got them the seats. See it’s a symbiotic relationship. Any solutions for this?]

All of us are so full of prejudices against one another always judging one another. I admit to disliking this whole reservation bit, honestly I wish I didn’t but I do and that is sad. Getting past this is difficult. [I’ll try.] In all of these years I did meet a few people who have been --- how do I put this? I’ll call them people who have a calming effect on me. One girl she is my classmate, she is a Muslim married to a Christian who goes to the temple to pray – now that’s what I call being "secular". :) Friends who are like minded in believing that they are better off depending on themselves instead of others or on someone who is a force above us magnified and made larger than life to help us make our lives as easy and simple as can be. [Really? God has made life simple? Huh? How? Remind me.]